LOSTBLOG -- "316"

I refused to watch "Lost" for so long, because I just knew that any explanation the writers would offer up for the island would inevitably disappoint. I didn't want to waste years of my life trying to figure out a TV show, only to see the story go completely off the rails -- I already did that for nine seasons with "The X-Files."

So when I finally caved and started watching the "Lost" DVDs last year, I had this horrible thought in the back of my head plaguing me, even though I was totally into the story every step of the way -- they crash, Claire gets kidnapped, they find the Hatch, they push the button, on and on and on -- I couldn't help but fear that, one day, showrunners Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse would go too far and explain too much.

That fear almost came true last night.

I blurted out the phrase "jump the shark" -- along with some choice obscenities -- during the first 20 minutes of "316," in which Ms. Hawking disappoints the entire audience with the show's explanation for how the Oceanic Six can get back to the island. "You have to re-create the original conditions of the crash as best you can." What?!?! Even in the topsy-turvy universe of "Lost," that makes little to no sense. But Jack acted as our proxy -- much like Locke would act as Christian's on the flight, apparently -- calling Eloise's explanation ridiculous, and Ben took us to Sunday school with the "Doubting Thomas" story. Lindelof and Cuse, who wrote the episode themselves, acknowledge the giant leap of faith they are asking from their audience, all while amping up the religious allegory.

The religious stuff is what worries me the most about last night's episode. The parallels between John Locke and Jesus Christ are undeniable, and poured on pretty thick. (Look at the title of the episode, fer Chrissakes. Er, I mean, for crying out loud.) Is this going to become the focus of the story now? Will Locke rise as the Losties' savior, or be revealed as a false prophet? The show could still be a science-fiction/mystery story with either of those things happening, but it runs the risk of alienating large portions of its fanbase -- myself included -- if the show's struggles of faith, science and morality become explicitly religious. I don't mind Locke becoming a Christ figure; I will mind it if Locke starts spouting off about Christ.

The religious overtones continue next week in "The Life and Death of Jeremy Bentham," in which we will presumably see Locke's sacrifice and resurrection. It's another episode scripted by Lindelof and Cuse themselves, and therefore will almost certainly be integral to how the rest of the show plays out.

After that detour into theology and Chris Carter-esque exposition, "316" changed the show again. The Losties are already back on the island, but when? From the looks of Jin's shiny new DHARMA van and spiffy DHARMA jumpsuit, I'm guessing we're back in the groovy '70s, baby. Will the Oceanic Six become part of the DI?

But what I'm really excited about is the new mystery -- and new opportunity for flashbacks -- that "316" gave us. We saw what happened to Jack between the O6's visit to the Lamppost and their arrival back at the island, and Sun's motivation for getting on the plane is clear. But what happened to Kate, Hugo, Sayid and Ben? There are some obvious assumptions we can make:

• Kate gave Aaron to Claire's mother.
• "Charlie" visited Hugo and told him to get on the plane.
• Sayid was arrested and deported. (But why to Guam?)
• Ben killed Penny, or at least tried to.

Discovering if these assumptions are correct will undoubtedly be the focus of the rest of the season. (Or at least, you know, the next five episodes. Are they moving this along quickly, or what?) But there will also be fun to had in watching how the Losties adjust to life in the DHARMA Initiative, if, in fact, they are back in the program's heyday.

Ultimately, last night's episode gave me hope the story would move in exciting new directions; but I can't help but wonder if we're all headed toward our religious indoctrination. Funnily enough, I pray that doesn't happen.

• • •

Best scene: The Losties reunite on Ajira Airways Flight 316, and a variation on Oceanic 815's fateful trip unfolds. This time, Sayid is with a federal marshal; Hugo is carrying a guitar; Jack has a very important letter in his pocket; Locke is in a coffin in the baggage compartment; and so on. (And the pilot who was originally supposed to fly Oceanic 815, Frank Lapidus, is at the helm.)

Best line: Ben is always lying, even when he's telling a joke. Jack: "How can you read?" / Ben: "My mother taught me."

Best performance: It's Michael Emerson again. I can't wait to see why Ben is bruised and beaten (again) when he gets on the airplane.